Sunday, January 22, 2006


I have come to the following conclusion: I would much rather be alone. Yet another dud, who started out with a small amount of potential. So, since I can't seem to get what I want (that's probably because I keep looking for it) I'm going to let it come to me.
Now I said it before, but I was feeling some type of way at that point. I have quickly moved on from there. So no, I'm not back on the market, but yes, I am single by choice. And this time, I'm not giving that up. There is just no reason. I am this close to the man hating point, so before I get there, I'm just going to step off.
I consulted with my sister about this earlier today. May I add that was one of the dumbest decisions I've ever made:
J: How's school.
N: Whack as sh*t. Ain't nothin but these bum ass valley niggas out here. And all the black niggas is wit a white b*tch.
J: That bad huh.
N: F*ck you. What's up wit your nigga?
J: Don't have one.
N: What happened to the nig-
J: Don't want to talk about it.
N: Ya'll had a fight or somethin?
J: We were never together to have a fight.
N: So what happened?
J: He's a f*ckin bum. Just like the rest of them.
N: Damn now you sound like me.
J: Yeah, well, maybe you're on to somethin.

N: You like him?
J: I did.
N: So what's the problem? If you like him what's the problem?
J: He's a piece of shit, Lazy. Straight like that. I'm done with him. When a nigga got an excuse for every single f*ckin time he needs you to come over tomorrow, then you don't need him.
N: (lowers her music) What happened mija?
J: We have yet to go on a real date. And the kids sh*t is botherin me too. He keeps postponin because someone in his family is always "sick." How everytime the nigga calls me his ass is visiting someone in the hospital? So handle your f*ckin business, bitch.
N: Damn, now you really sound like me. *Laughs* So what you gonna do?
J: Same shit I shoulda did long ago. Shut my sh*t off.
So I'm back to being the same old screw faced bitch I was two months ago. :)


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Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take and may this song play all the way, through. And if it skip a beat, hit repeat, this the realest shit I ever wrote, this is me. If it skip a beat, hit repeat, This the realest shit I ever wrote, this is me. -Juelz Sanatana, This Is Me, What The Game's Been Missing