Friday, November 18, 2005

Let's Be Real 2

This particular topic comes up in my neck of the woods all the time. It's something people can't help but discuss because nobody can run out of opinions. It is also the chance to prove yourself 'close-minded' as many would say. So be it.

Today's Topic: Interracial Relationships
(Before I continue, I'm not talking about every race, I'm talking about the black/white thing.)
I will begin by saying when I'm sitting on a bus or train, or walking through the streets and a couple comes toward me smiling brightly with Ebony and Ivory playing loudly behind them, yes, I do cringe and turn away. No I don't make faces (I was brought up that it is rude to make faces and point) but I do on the inside. Why?
Black slaves were murdered when it was thought that they carried on some affair with their white mistress. White women were put on a pedestal. Black women were subhuman, less than nothing. In return, black women were raped repeatedly by slavemasters who denied having anything to do with them. How much of that were people supposed to take?
Coming forward in time, nothing changed beyond the fact that slavery was abolished. The majority of white people (and before I continue let me also say that I do not believe white folks are the devil, that all white folks are evil or that all white folks are racist. As you can recall, the Quakers were white and did all they could to help as many slaves as possible) were brought up misguided and taught to hate black people. (Or anyone who didn't look like them for that matter.)
Now that all the history is out of the way, I can get to my point. Since the white woman has for years been viewed as the ultimate prize, (light skin, long light hair, light eyes) and the darker sisters were led to believe that they weren't beautiful and would never measure up, why not go for the gold?
Personally, I think these woman are desirable because they will do what a black woman won't. They say stereotypes have a bit of truth to them. I'm not going to let you talk to me anyway, order me around, put your hands on me, or be submissive with childlike innocence. You're a grown woman for Godsakes. Why is your man running your life? It has been said that a white woman will put up with what a black woman won't. In some cases this is true. (See the Brothers, the scene with Bill Bellamy and the Tessie chick)
Another reason some go for the gold ( I like that phrase, I think I'll keep using it) is because of rejection. After constant failed relationships with members of your own race, you may feel discouraged. Tired of having their heart hurt, one may say they would rather give another race a chance than keep waiting around and keep getting the same response.
I've come to notice a big part of GFTG is perception. Assumption, really. People assume that all black women are automatically "ghetto". Not true. (We just ain't havin it. Four hundred years of slavery, we ain't fittin to take nobody else's sh*t, hear me?) White women know how to present themselves in public and black women are loud and abrasive. White women can dress for the office and black women only own clothes for the club. White women can speak proper English, black women only speak Ebonics. White women cater to their man's every beck and call and black women are always starting fights. White women aspire to have good families and jobs and black women are striving to be in the next music video to pay their rent and feed their kids.
(Let me be the first to say that I can disprove this stereotype. I know how to act in public, I have no children, I speak fluent English, read 200 WPM and type 70 WPM, probably own more suits than the average eighteen year old, I treat my man as good if not better than he treats me, and I have dreams and aspirations out of this world.)
So why not GFTG when all you see is your women being portrayed negatively? You have a better chance of getting ahead with a trophy on your arm, right? Not that Keisha from down the block who is bound to make scene if you take her anywhere.
Love who you want to love. I have no problem with that. But don't expect me to be cool with it. I do not believe you should live by other people's standards of happiness. Just keep in mind thats its never going to be widely smiled upon, much like gay marriage. You run the risk of being hated on and dissed. That's just the way it is. I'm not going to take out my beliefs on anyone, I'm not driving past shouting 'nigger-lover' at the top of my lungs, no. Do you. Just don't bring it around me.
I'll finish out by saying this: in 1955 an innocent young man was brutally and savagely murdered because it was assumed that he allegedly whistled at a white woman. A child, was murdered like a pig at the slaughter house because it was thought that he whistled at a white woman. Harmless whistling. Happens to me in the street all the time. Had he been white the circumstances would have been quite different.
You go head and date em if you wanna.

Next week's post: Immigration


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