Thursday, January 05, 2006

Sexta-Septa-Octagenarian

Yet another crazy post inspired by Monica. We were discussing Jazzy mobiles and elbows and things of that nature when the subject of old folks came up.
*Please exit now if you are offended by anyone's views on senior citizens.*

I was raised to respect everyone older than you. You did not talk back or down to any adults. As I grew older, my views on this sort of changed. I must say they maybe jaded because of my experiences but this is the way it is.
I stopped liking older people long ago. Wait, let me rephrase, I stopped liking the old people in this city long ago. The way they take advantage of their age kills me. I mean, I have never seen anyone milk something like old folks milk their age. They use their "senrority" to get ahead and get these breaks that no one else gets and then they abuse their rights. Now all of them, but a greater majority.
Examples? Of course I have examples.
Back when I was running 45 laps a day in gym, I used to be in straight up Tiger Balm-Icy Hot Sleeve-Epsom Salt pain each and every day. I was late to class for the sheer fact that I couldn't make it from one end of the hallway to the other as fast as everyone else. I hurt that bad. So when I finally made it to the bus stop at the end of the day, all I wanted to do was sit my tired ass down. Just like Rosa Parks. This particular day was no different.
Now I don't know how it is in other states, but here we have designated seating for seniors. It's called the front of the freakin bus. Right there. Big ass black signs say PRIORITY SEATING. I'm comfy in my seat in the back. Stretching my legs, the whole nine. Homegirl gets back there and gives me the up down like I'm supposed to move. Mind you she had to walk through the front of the empty bus to get to the crowded back. Old boy across from me says,
"When I was bein brought up, you gave up your seat for older folk. That's just sad."
To which I reply,
"Funny. I don't see you jumpin up to give her your seat."
Silence.
"That's what I thought." I put my head back in my book.
Who the hell was he kidding with that shit? I don't give a rat's ass and you all you know that by now. My ass was in pain and I was going to sit down. Straight like that. I didn't see him hopping up offereing reflexology for my bad knee's and shit. No. He just wants to run his mouth and ty to be a glorified old people activist. Fuck that and fuck you buddy. Needless to say, she walked back to the front where she was given a PRIORITY seat.
Things like that happen all the time. Stay by the front and catch a seat up there. Or else get a chauffer and have them Drive Miss Daisy. But don't get on the public transportation adn act like I'm supposed to get up. Same reason I don't get up for pregnant chicks, kids, couples, Mexicans, ignore that last one...Giving up a seat is a kindness of the heart thing, not a requirement. I get up if it's convenient for me.
Oh My God Jacki! You really don't get up for pregnant women?
Hell mutherfucking no.
Why? When my mother was seven months pregnant with my twin brothers, I was designated seat securer. My lil ass had to run for seats so she could sit down. People looked at her and rolled their eyes. To this day if there is one seat left and I'm with her, best believe she sits and I stand. So yes, I'm taking it out on the rest of the world.
I don't get up for couples because I'm not into that lovey dovey shit. And because I'm jealous.
I don't get up for kids because these little bastards need to learn some things. And their mothers too. If you let them stand they'll be too tired and cranky to bother you when you get home. Nap time problem solved. Another thing, if you get up and stand in front of them, they'll kick your knees until you get out of the way. If you think I'm above beating down someone's child on the train...

On a lighter note...Monica, since I've finished ...Aint Gold I'm just going to post another chapter or two every week until the finale. BoricuenQueen654, no I'm not giving hints. Yes it's going to be good. And a book? Who knows? I'll think about it.

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